The New Normal? (Part 1)

We can’t remember a time since 2003 that we’ve spent as much time at home as we have during this 2020 season of the pandemic. Admittedly at the outset, it initially seemed like it would interrupt life for a few months and then we’d be back on the road, but we know now that was wishful thinking. So here we are, 4.5 months into a very modified life, being forced to confirm this is the “new normal” for the foreseeable future.

In the midst of living a cautionary life, over the past two months we’ve managed to fly to Dallas, Texas, and San Diego, California, on two separate trips; to drive 4200 miles across country—from San Diego to Boston; to officiate two weddings and attend a third; to drive to Northern Virginia and back; and to visit (at safe distance) multiple sets of very important-to-us friends. We have masked, sanitized, met outdoors, and been prudent . . . but we have not stopped living. 

Additionally, we have presented a webinar for the Thrive Conference and done hours and hours of counseling by Zoom.

And we have continued doing renovations on our home, walked at least five miles a day, brought dozens of meals to people recovering or mourning, enjoyed leisurely quiet times in the Word, and tried to pay enough attention to what’s going on in the world to be informed, but not too much to be overwhelmed by the confusion and manipulation for which the media is increasingly well known.

Back to mid-June: instead of flying to Kauai for our long anticipated family reunion, Paul and I flew to Dallas to attend the wedding of the son of longtime family friends. It was such a joy to celebrate with McCray and Braden Fletcher as they entered the covenant of marriage with hearts fully surrendered to Christ. With so much inescapable pain seemingly everywhere, to be part of something so good and honorable was a gift. McCray’s grandfather, Paul Fletcher, had passed away a month earlier, so we were especially grateful that attending the wedding afforded us the opportunity to spend an afternoon with Tonia, Paul’s widow, who has been a lifelong adult friend.

Off to Dallas we flew, masked and sanitized.

Off to Dallas we flew, masked and sanitized.

McCray and Braden are beautiful reflections of Christlikeness as they live their lives surrendered to Him.

McCray and Braden are beautiful reflections of Christlikeness as they live their lives surrendered to Him.

Eternally-young Tonia stands with her son Rod and his wife Heather.

Eternally-young Tonia stands with her son Rod and his wife Heather.

We took full advantage of our time in Dallas and attended Stonebriar Church to hear the inimitable Chuck Swindoll preach to 10% of his normal congregation due to gathering restrictions. Though it felt very weird to be sitting in a sea of mostly empty seats, we were so thankful for the opportunity to gather with the Body of Christ in person.

Stonebriar Church in Frisco, Texas . . . at safe distance.

Stonebriar Church in Frisco, Texas . . . at safe distance.

We spent a wonderful morning with our dear friends Marcus and Alyssa and their crew at their ranch west of Ft. Worth and loved every minute of eating, exploring, and catching up.

Such a great time with this precious family . . .

Such a great time with this precious family . . .

On to dinner with this crew . . . and what delight it was to meet their new baby and to catch up with them.

. . . and with this one.

. . . and with this one.

In between brunch and dinner, we popped in for a visit with our dear friends from Trinidad, Jen and Javed. They have relocated to Texas in the past year and it was so good to be with them.

So grateful for an even brief visit with Jen and Javed.

So grateful for an even brief visit with Jen and Javed.

After packing those 3.5 days in Dallas full, we flew home and managed a visit/dinner with our dear friends Sebastian and Lindsey, who were returning to their home in Florida after spending several months in Massachusetts to have their third child. We love this sweet family and are so thankful to have them in our lives.

And baby makes three . . .

And baby makes three . . .

Typically we miss out on any events that happen during the summer due to camps, but with camps canceled, we’ve had the privilege of celebrating numerous milestone occasions with friends. This evening was spent with friends celebrating God’s faithfulness and we were so happy to be a part of it. We all enjoyed delicious Lebanese food which ended with American s’mores over the fire pit, but the real joy was in acknowledging God’s goodness and grace. Great evening. 

Friends from the Arabic Evangelical Baptist Church gathered to celebrate the faithfulness of God and we were privileged to be a part of the party.

Friends from the Arabic Evangelical Baptist Church gathered to celebrate the faithfulness of God and we were privileged to be a part of the party.

The June 26th wedding of Richie and Jess was significantly scaled down, but the show went on. In a beautiful ceremony overlooking the lake in Mendon, Paul officiated the nuptials of this sweet couple we’ve gotten to know over the past year. They are committed to honoring Jesus in their marriage and it was a privilege to share this special day with them.

Richie and Jess got married in front of 20 instead of 200, but they’re just as married.

Richie and Jess got married in front of 20 instead of 200, but they’re just as married.

Off to California we flew the morning after Richie and Jess’s wedding, and taking advantage of a 3-hour layover in St. Louis, we had lunch with our “adopted” Williams family. How we love these guys! We had an animated conversation over bbq and were so thankful for the opportunity to catch up with them in person.

Grant and Emily Williams and daughters Madeline and Sarah Elizabeth had lunch with us during a long layover in St. Louis en route to California.

Grant and Emily Williams and daughters Madeline and Sarah Elizabeth had lunch with us during a long layover in St. Louis en route to California.

The trip to San Diego was expressly to “deconstruct” my mama’s earthly home, redistributing her “material things” to new homes, and getting her property ready to sell. We knew it would be hard . . . we just didn’t know how hard. Thankfully our daughter Lisa joined us and she always makes everything better. Joining my sister Laura and brother-in-law David, who had driven out from Virginia to superintend this task, we spent 4.5 days non-stop sorting, deciding, distributing, and remembering . . . and it was mostly hard, punctuated with some moments of happy laughter or story-telling prompted by a possession/picture/memory. 

The best moments came the day we spent emptying out the attic space above the garage of the home my parents lived in until 1978 (and have rented out since). Stuffed in the trusses were boxes and trunks of memorabilia, largely relics of my father’s Naval career. We unearthed his original uniforms, worn by him as a young 17-year-old enlisted sailor, and journals, photos, and other pieces of evidence supporting his passionate service to our country. 

It wasn’t just his “stuff.” Among the many treasures, we found the ladder to the bunk bed set I grew up with, complete with a petrified piece of bubble gum fixed to the top post which I had “parked” there probably 55 years ago. Lisa snagged that ladder and we repurposed it into a blanket ladder for her home, chalk painting right over that wad of gum. 

We also found the 3” stack of halved index cards, each bearing scripture memory verses on both sides, rubber banded together, reflecting the wear and tear of being held in the sweaty hand of my father as he jogged each day. Talk about treasure . . . “For where your treasure is, your heart will be also.” (Matthew 6:21). My father loved God’s Word and constantly “consumed” it. I love these cards.

My father’s memory verse cards, faithfully carried each morning as he jogged through the streets long before it was popular to do.

My father’s memory verse cards, faithfully carried each morning as he jogged through the streets long before it was popular to do.

His first sailor uniform, worn by him as a young 17-year-old when he enlisted during the Korean War.

His first sailor uniform, worn by him as a young 17-year-old when he enlisted during the Korean War.

And his final uniform, worn by him as a Rear Admiral, about 35 years after he donned that sailor uniform.

And his final uniform, worn by him as a Rear Admiral, about 35 years after he donned that sailor uniform.

Tucked away in yet another box were the shoe skates which were the highlight of Christmas back in the early 60’s.

Tucked away in yet another box were the shoe skates which were the highlight of Christmas back in the early 60’s.

We worked non-stop until Wednesday night, July 1, before heading north to Riverside to spend a few days with Lisa. There are few things Paul enjoys more than doing house projects for his beloved single daughter, so we spent the next several days hanging ceiling fans, refinishing furniture, hanging pictures, etc, for a very appreciative lady. We got so much accomplished in her house, and still managed to spend some time with our dear friend Wendy Turney as well as our mentors, John and Grace Tebay. Both visits were such gifts to our grieving souls.

Lisa and I met up with Wendy for coffee one morning . . .

Lisa and I met up with Wendy for coffee one morning . . .

. . . and we had a delightful visit with John and Grace Tebay, who continue to mentor us over 40 years later. So blessed.

. . . and we had a delightful visit with John and Grace Tebay, who continue to mentor us over 40 years later. So blessed.

Paul delighted in refinishing some furniture for Lisa . . .

Paul delighted in refinishing some furniture for Lisa . . .

. . . as well as hanging a couple of ceiling fans . . .

. . . as well as hanging a couple of ceiling fans . . .

. . . and here is the repurposed bunk bed ladder turned blanket ladder.

. . . and here is the repurposed bunk bed ladder turned blanket ladder.

We left Riverside first thing Monday morning, July 6, to make our way to Boston . . . driving. We bought my mother’s Honda from the estate and loaded it up with “stuff” from her estate. First stop, Oakland! We had a delightful evening with the Garcias in their new land, left some of Grammie’s stuff with them, and drove 18.5 hours the next day to Denver. 

We decided we won’t do that again.

Drive 18.5 hours in a day, that is. We’ll return to Denver. :)

A few hours with the Garcias was all we got, but we enjoyed every minute of it.

A few hours with the Garcias was all we got, but we enjoyed every minute of it.

We spent Wednesday in Denver and I’ll continue reflections of our journey in part 2.

For now, we are trying to understand how God is leading us and what He is saying to us about Himself, about ourselves, and about those He has brought into our lives during this time of recalibrating life according to this “new normal.” Stayed tuned for part 2, coming soon!!